


I Just Met You, But Call Me Maybe

by modambrosia



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Drinking, F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship, First Meetings, Flirting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-12
Updated: 2017-12-12
Packaged: 2019-02-13 17:57:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12989424
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/modambrosia/pseuds/modambrosia
Summary: “Hey,” she squeaks in a voice too loud, eyes flickering to the side before settling back on him, “it’s you, oh my gosh! I haven’t seen you in ages, how have you been!”It's always nice to be greeted warmly by a pal.Too bad Sans has never met this human before in his life.





	1. So a Stranger Came Up to me in a Bar...

**Author's Note:**

> A short little something while I'm plotting out the next chapter for AWKS. This will be two chapters long- first chapter is sorta from Sans' view, and second will be from the perspective of you, the Reader!

He’s on his third bottle of ketchup, head resting in the palm of his hand while he watches Grillby clean another set of beer glasses. The bar is bustling today- humans love going out on Friday nights, and being above ground has caused business to boom at the start of the weekend- and Sans is content to people watch on his night off. 

Earlier a young couple had walked in, clearly at least five rounds deep and hopping from bar to bar, stumbling around and making quite a show of themselves until they got kicked out. A few seats down an older human man has begun arguing with one of the televisions, his sports team doing poorly enough to warrant some foul language every now and again. A handful of human women crowd each other inside a booth behind him, squealing and taking photos of one another, signaling to Grillby for another round. Everywhere around him there’s noise, laughter, the clinking of cups, someone tugging on his sleeve-

Someone tugging on his sleeve? 

Glancing to his left, Sans finds a human- a young woman, her eyes wide and slightly frantic, a tight smile pulling at the corners of her cheeks. She’s close, uncomfortably so, and Sans tries to pull away, only for her to shuffle forward again and close the gap. 

“Hey,” she squeaks in a voice too loud, eyes flickering to the side before settling back on him, “it’s you, oh my gosh! I haven’t seen you in  _ ages,  _ how have you been!” Sans tugs at his sleeve again, eyes narrowing as he watches her stare at him too unblinkingly, the smile on her face not reaching her eyes. 

“uh-” 

“Gosh, and your- your, uh, family, how are they? Everyone still doing well?” Something’s not right- she’s still too close, and she’s still got a firm grasp on his sleeve, but her eyes keep skirting to the side of Sans’ face before flitting back to him. She doesn’t smell too strongly of alcohol, so not a drunkard mistaking him for someone else. An itch at the back of Sans’ neck catches his attention, the kind of sensation that comes with being watched. 

Oh.  _ Oooh.  _

Sans tilts his head to the side a bit, questioningly, and the girl gives a slight nod to their right. Without moving his head, Sans peeks to his side- two human men sit at a small table, each of them a bit drunk and closely watching this girl speak to him. Sans glances back to the human girl holding his arm, her eyes growing a bit wider, her smile becoming almost manic. Sans reaches forward with both arms and holds her shoulders, giving a hearty laugh and tugging her to sit in the bar seat beside him. 

“oh, wow, it’s you! i didn’t recognize you for a second there, it’s been so long,” Sans says. Immediately, her smile becomes relaxed, the tension leaving her body as Sans plays along with the false friendship. He continues this fake conversation- his fake sister just got married last fall, and he recently adopted a pretend puppy named Tomato. Sans makes sure to keep talking so that she doesn’t have to speak except for jumping in with a nodding head or pleasant fake chuckle. 

The men watching her lose interest as they realize she is no longer easy prey, knocking back the last of their beers before slapping a few bills on the table and meandering out of the bar. The girl watches them leave, shoulders slumping as she watches the door swing shut behind them, and leans against the bar while turning back to Sans. 

“Thank you  _ so  _ much, I’m sorry for springing that act on you outta nowhere. I noticed them watching me and when I thought they were gonna come up to me I panicked and grabbed the closest person I could find.”

“no worries kid,” Sans chuckles, taking a sip of ketchup and relishing in the thinly veiled confusion on the stranger’s face, “glad i was able to  _ ketchup  _ with your plan in time to help you out.” The girl snorts at his pun, then looks to the side shyly and makes as though to stand up. 

“Well, I’ll get outta your hair now, sorry to bother-” 

“woah there, who said you were a bother? i told you kid, it’s all good. sit and relax with me for a little bit.” The nervous discomfort painted in her expression smooths away to subtle surprise, as though she didn’t expect Sans to find her company anything  _ but  _ a bother. He raises a hand to call Grillby over for her and she smiles in gratitude, asking for something fruity imbued with calming magic to help ease her leftover nerves from before. As she takes her first sip of the frothy beverage, she meets Sans’ gaze and mumbles around the straw,

“So, you said the wedding reception was good? Where’d she get married at?” Sans sputters around the nozzle of his ketchup bottle which sprays the condiment all over the counter in front of him and sends a sorry smile at Grillby’s stern look. The girl’s eyes have gone wide with shock. Sans coughs a bit, wipes his mouth on his sleeve, attempting to control his giggling.

“kid... i made all that up. i was winging it- you thought i was serious?” Her face flushes red and Sans suddenly feels a bit bad for laughing at her. He reaches out a boney hand and she glances at it for only a moment before taking it in her own softer grasp. 

“let’s try this again,” he says with a warm grin and a lilt to his voice, “i’m Sans. Sans the skeleton.” She giggles- and  _ wow _ , Sans thinks to himself,  _ that sure sounds nice.  _ She tells him her name and sits with him for another round of drinks. She laughs at his puns with that snorty, airy giggle of hers. He tells her about his brother and she admits that she’d love to meet him sometime. 

At the end of the night, when she’s sliding off of the stool and laying her payment on the counter, she slips a scrap of paper into his jacket pocket. The brush of her hand against his bones through the fabric makes his soul jump. 

“My friends may call me crazy for being so bold...but you can call me anytime.” 

She winks and walks away with pep in her step; the red flush on her cheeks is rivaled only by the deep cerulean on Sans’ own. A quiet sound of crackling firewood and mirth makes Sans realize that Grillby saw the whole thing; Sans chuckles and ducks his head down into his hoodie.

“You’ll call her, will you not? She seemed rather taken with you.” Hearing Grillby say this only unleashes a second round of butterflies in his belly.  _ Rather taken with me, huh?  _

“yeah. yeah, i’m gonna call her.”


	2. So I Went Up to this Stranger in a Bar...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He holds out a skeletal hand; you easily slide your own into his hold. You’d be lying if you said his deep cadence and charming nature didn’t give you butterflies in your tummy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Same story, but with a twist! Now it's from YOUR point of view!

When you and your friends decided to spend the evening at a new monster bar in town, you honestly didn’t know what to expect. Sure, you looked it up on yelp and saw nothing but great reviews from humans and monsters alike, but a small part of you still held that inkling of fear when it came to monsters. 

You were wrong, of course- the moment you walked in your group had gotten wonderful service, wonderful food and drinks, and every monster you spoke to had pleasant and happy things to say. You were having such a good time that even when your friends were ready to leave you had chosen to stay behind and have a bit more fun.

Your good mood didn’t last long. 

Upon walking up to stand at the bar, the back of your neck began to prickle and an air of discomfort overtook you.  _ What the fuck?  _ You leaned forward on the counter in an effort to appear relaxed while nonchalantly glancing around the room. A couple of women were yelling and laughing but otherwise minding their business, aside from calling loudly for another round from the barkeep. Some old dude is ready to fight the tv because his team is having a bad season. 

_ Oh, shit.  _ There, across the room, two men are seated at a small table by themselves. They’ve got quite a few empty mugs and bottles scattered about the tabletop. Both of them have got drunken smirks on their faces, and the suggestive way one of them looks up and down your body leaves little to the imagination on what exactly he’s got on his mind at the moment. 

Panic sweeps down your spine and you whip back around to the bar, eyes staring blankly ahead. Your friends have probably already made it home and though you know they would rush back to save you in a heartbeat, it would take them  _ at least  _ ten, fifteen minutes to make it back. Plan B- find someone close by. 

Glancing to your left finds a blob monster. You can’t locate a mouth, eyes, or ears anywhere on its form. Going off of the monsters you’ve seen so far, there are odds it simply has none- you can’t strike up a conversation with them.  _ A bust on that one, then.  _

Turning to your right, you discover a skeleton person. They’ve got a goofy grin on their face and a bottle of ketchup held loosely in one boney grasp. Something about his appearance draws you in. He seems pleasant.  _ Bingo.  _ His jacket is soft in your hold when you reach forward and grab him by the sleeve, giving it a tug. 

He turns to you in confusion and you look him in the eye...lights?... with what you hope is enough panic to signal him in to your dilemma.  _ Gosh, don’t look so surprised, they’ll realize you don’t know me! _

“Hey! It’s you, oh my gosh! I haven’t seen you in ages, how have you been!” You say it with a bit too much enthusiasm and you pray to whichever gods will listen to clue him in. Nope, no luck yet, he’s probably under the impression you’re some drunk weirdo mistaking him for someone else. A slight peek to the side, and yes, the guys are still staring.  _ Come on, bone guy! I can’t get much more obvious than this!  _ You try again, 

“Gosh, and your- your, uh, family, how are they? Everyone still doing well?” His face, some sort of malleable bone, squishes in confusion. You smile a bit harder at him and something must click, because his eye holes go from slanted in apprehension to wide with realization. His skull tilts in question; your eyes skirt back to the two men. The urge to whoop in success is something you barely manage to subdue. Relief washes through you when he takes you in his hands with a hearty belly laugh and pulls you to sit down beside him. 

“oh, wow, it’s you! i didn’t recognize you for a second there, it’s been so long,” he chuckles. Any fear you’d still held for the monsters in the bar dissipates the longer he talks to you.  _ And to think I was scared of what the monsters could do to me, when in the end it was my fellow humans I had to watch out for!  _  He tells you about his sister’s wedding, about his puppy named Tomato, and you’d be lying if you said his deep cadence and charming nature didn’t give you butterflies in your tummy. 

The two men lose interest and leave the bar and it’s as though the weight of the world is finally lifted off of your shoulders. Unfortunately, their departure also removes any reason you may have for continuing to chat up your new friend. 

“Thank you so much, I’m sorry for springing that act on you outta nowhere. I noticed them watching me and when I thought they were gonna come up to me I panicked and grabbed the closest person I could find.”   
“no worries kid,” he shrugs while taking a sip of the ketchup bottle-  _ uh, what the heck?-  _ “glad i was able to ketchup with your plan in time to help you out.” It may be because you’re developing a bit of a crush on this guy, but his pun gets an embarrassing snort out of you and you drop your eyes from his.  _ Okay, nice, that was the worst noise I’ve ever made! Time to run away!  _ You stand up to leave with an offhand comment about getting out of his hair ( _ I hope that doesn’t offend him, since he doesn’t have any _ ) but he sits up straight and stops you.

“woah there, who said you were a bother? i told you kid, it’s all good. sit and relax with me for a little bit.” A bit surprised that he’d offer to continue spending time with you, your previous embarrassment fades away into bashful joy. He calls over the barkeep and you order something from the Drink of the Day menu, a fruity blend with magic that’s supposed to make you feel relaxed while speaking to the skeleton in front of you. 

In an attempt at keeping the conversation going you ask about his sister’s wedding only for him to burst into laughter around his ketchup bottle. Apparently, all of that was made up on the fly. Before you can crawl away to die from the awkwardness in peace, he holds out a skeletal hand; you easily slide your own into his hold. 

“let’s try this again. i’m Sans. Sans the skeleton.” You give him your name and the two of you chat amiably for a while longer. He’s funny in a natural way and you can’t help laughing at nearly everything he says. His brother- a real sibling this time- sounds like the nicest person in the world, and you tell Sans that you’d love to meet him sometime. When you realize how late it’s gotten and know you need to leave, one last glance at his warm smile gives you the burst of courage needed to be a bit forward. 

You scribble your phone number on a scrap of paper and slip it into his jacket pocket. The feeling of his bones through the fabric is mesmerizing, and you wish you could linger a moment longer. He likes jokes, right?  _ Think of something cool to say, quick! _

“My friends may call me crazy for being so bold...but you can call me anytime.”  _ OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD,  _ your mind races and your heart is beating about a mile a minute. The bright blue color that rushes to his cheekbones almost stops you in your tracks, but you push through with a wink and force yourself to get out of there before you do something even more embarrassing. 

Once safely outside, you dare to peek back in through one of the windows. The barkeeper sidles up, says something with a smirk; Sans somehow blushes even more, slipping his head into the safety of his hoodie. You feel another rush of butterflies in your stomach and the giddiness of it all leaves you feeling lightheaded.

_ Yeah, he’s definitely gonna call me. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Don't forget, you can also find me on my tumblr at https://modambrosia.tumblr.com/ :-)
> 
>  
> 
> ...Hmmm....should I write another story about them meeting up again sometime after this? Decisions, decisions...

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Don't forget, you can also find me on my tumblr at https://modambrosia.tumblr.com/ :-)


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